I’ve been through about 5 different jobs in the past 3 years. I know what it seems like, I can’t stick to anything. Which you’re right to some extent. But I have a dream. Not like a MLK dream, I mean he had a phenomenal one. But mine is to simply be happy at work. It sounds easy enough right? Wrong. We spend more hours at our jobs than we do at home. Well, most of us do.
New York City
When I lived in New York I had to support myself on a salary that was well below minimum wage and they got away with it because they were a startup and I guess laws don’t apply to startups? Before this job, I worked at a multi million dollar company that had amazing benefits and amazing people, some of who are still my best friends. The money was decent enough and it was sales so you could control how much you made. The issue with that was that I was bad at sales. So my paychecks weren’t great. I worked this job for 6 months before I got the job at a DIY website startup.
I barely got by with the salary from this startup and I learned a lot of lessons along the way and to be honest I felt so independent that I really didn’t care at times. Except when I couldn’t afford to do laundry because I wanted to go to a bar that Friday instead. So I washed my underwear in the sink and hung them up to dry. I took a picture of it to look back on because I had never felt so low in my life. I vowed that I would ask for a raise and start making more money as soon as I could. I got two raises in the next 3 months that followed. I still wasn’t making that much in comparison to New York standards but I was LIVIN’. And then I met Rick.
Philadelphia, here I come…
We started dating in July 2017 and my apartment lease was coming to an end in October. In New York, you really don’t give much thought into finding a new apartment until about two weeks before you need to move because apartments fly on and off the market. I interviewed with about four different sets of roommates and places because I was NOT going to live with the previous girls. And nothing worked out. They all found friends that needed a place and didn’t want a stranger, which I understood but also felt very rejected.
I was in Philly visiting Rick one weekend when I got a text from a girl I had just interviewed with to live in her apartment saying that she had found a friend from home to move in. “Good luck with your search!” she said. I told Rick, looking sad and stressed. And we decided that I should move to Philadelphia and commute to work each day in New York City. Holy hell that was a terrible idea, the commuting part, not the moving part.
I’m convinced that Rick is an angel sent to me from Heaven. So lame, I know. But this wonderful man drove into the city and had to keep moving his car around the block, while moving my stuff out of my apartment because I had to work and my boss wouldn’t let me take the day off…… if that tells you anything about how that job was. By the time I was able to leave work, Rick had gotten most of my stuff out of my apartment and into his car. We had a few last minute trips up and down and then we were off to Philadelphia.
It was probably the most overwhelming and exciting feeling driving away from those city lights. That city that taught me SO much about myself, life, work, relationships, people and so much more. What a magical place it is and I am so thankful to be able to say I found myself there and fell in love in New York City. It will always hold a special place in my heart.
The Beginning of the End
I began the commute the following day and it was as miserable as expected. I woke up at 5 and got to the city by 8. I left my office at 525 and got home at 8. I had asked my manager if it was possible to leave at 520 to catch an earlier train but she told me, “those 5 minutes add up and you will have to make them up at home.” So I did.
I was a producer for a live web streamed show. I had complete control of the show schedule so I moved it around. I moved the schedule so that there would be a 730 pm show. I would have two shows during the hours I was in the office and then take the train for 2 and half hours to produce another hour long show. It was terrible.
My experience there wasn’t always that way. I actually loved my job for a long time before it started it’s downward spiral. I never woke up and didn’t want to go to work. I had complete creative control over the content I would produce. I had amazing friends that I worked closely with. All in all, it was my dream job. Until it wasn’t anymore. The thing is, as amazing as it was, there was no growth there for me. When I decided to leave the company, they pawned my position off to a girl who had never done anything remotely close to the what my job had entailed. They got rid of my department all together a few months later.
Rick and I were in the peak of honeymoon phase. We had so much fun together decorating our new apartment and we were attached at the hip. To be honest, we still are. We have a hard time doing things separately and you can say that’s unhealthy but that’s love.
It was an extremely stressful year for Rick in terms of football and his career. He had bounced around the league to a few teams before he ultimately won the job against an 11 year veteran on the Eagles.
He was losing his hair from the stress and his confidence was non-existent. Thinking back on it, I knew how stressed he was but I guess I didn’t fully understand. That’s because I was dealing with my own issues and couldn’t see a way out of them. That’s called depression, you’ve probably heard of it. I fell into a hole that was so dark that I would wake up and just cry and cry . And have no idea why I was even crying! I couldn’t find a job in Philadelphia, nothing I wanted to do anyway. I went through some other serious health issues all the way up until the Super Bowl.
It was a rough year to say the least and we were still learning about each other. We always say that’s how we know we are meant to be because we have gone through some of the hardest tests in our first year of our relationship and we did it with love and lots of tears. And some yelling on my part.
Other Small Pit Stops
I started working for Oribe hair care in November of 2017. My roommate from college works in their corporate office and they needed freelance consultants in Philadelphia. Basically I was one of those women that are at makeup stores and want you to buy their products. It was actually pretty fun until I started getting bullied by the older women that worked in the stores. That story isn’t even worth telling honestly. I love Oribe and my boss that I had and I am still friends with her, she’s probably one of the best humans on earth.
I did that job here and there through out the year and it was easy money and I got free products so it was a win-win.
I had another sales job for a quick three week period but I knew it was not for me and that it was not long term.
Family Lives On Foundation
I am extremely lucky that I found Family Lives On Foundation, my current job. I found out about the foundation through a friend who worked closely with the foundation and I later found out that FLO was an Eagles Care Partner. Funny story – Jon Dorenbos, the player that Rick replaced, used to work with Family Lives On and attend our events. Small world, huh?
I am currently the Director of Sponsorship, which means that I ask companies to donate money to us. It is really hard most days but the reward is being able to help grieving kids. It is meaningful work and my schedule is super flexible which is great for football season. I also dabble in the social media side for the foundation so I get to be creative as well.
So there you have it, my career road. Life never really turns out exactly how we picture it but have faith that you will end up where you need to be. Also, you never really know what’s going on behind the pretty instagram filters.
I don’t know if I will be in this position forever but it is perfect for now.
Rick and I are stronger than ever and I’m so grateful for the lessons we learned in our first year! Don’t give up on people so easily. That’s my best advice.
Make it a great day!